Blog Post: 4th of July, 2002 edition!

Happy birthday, America!

Today, we celebrate the triumphs of the greatest nation on Earth. I'd even argue that it was God's true plan, all along, to create such a glorious and brave country. If I were in His position, I too would strive to create the most justified, valiant group of humans I could. And He has succeeded, under our great Nation! Click the BLOG link on the header above to read more about our incredible nation, and all the struggles we have had to face from the morally deranged Easterners.

Blog Post: America's Vietnam Victory!

Contrary to what the Commies might say, America absolutely won the Vietnam War, and gloriously at that! Our epic military raided that damn rainforest, guns swinging, and mowed down any sick Vietconger in our sights. We CHOSE to retreat, because we had the upper hand. We signed no motions of surrender. We always had the power, and eventually, we decided that Commies invading some random country in Asia just wasn't worth our effort! It was an absolutely epic battle for the ages. Click the BLOG link on the header above to read more about our awesomely undisputed WIN!

Blog Post: Women Were Overreacting

Maybe this will sound "misogynistic" or whatever, but should women really have fought for the right to vote? I mean, they really didn't have it too bad back in the day. I'd much rather be at home cooking, cleaning, and lounging around than worrying about my tenure at Harvard and managing this incredibly popular blog (no offense, readers!). My mother's sister was one of these "suffragists" back in the day, and needless to say, she wasn't invited to the family dinner parties anymore! Honestly, the whole ordeal was a headache for everyone involved, including the women. And now, I see women on their own blogs complaining about having too much work to do, how they miss seeing their kids, and how big and scary the world is! Welcome to the real world, guys, this is what you signed up for! Click the BLOG link on the header above to read more about the biggest mistake women have ever made.